What ? you may ask am I needing to get right. The answer is huge, It is the rest of the life I have left.
Some things seem to be set and I am unlikely to get my head round how to change those things. Other things I can take nibbles at and make small changes that will impact on yet other things. Some changes are easy and should make life better. If I'm thinking about this it must mean a dissatisfaction with things as they are, this is true in quite a number of things.
Can I live with being not really happy with life as it is? yes. I am able and have put up with worse. So why am I dragging all this up now? Its because I hurt, Inside I hurt.
I think about what was, and things I missed out on, I think about how I have let others down by my actions or indeed inaction.
So if I get down to it and do all I can to make the rest of my life something that has a much more posative impact on those arround me and those I love and care about will I achive all my goals. I don't know, it may not matter what I do, some wounds may never heal. Have I enough time left to win back respect and love that was lost, some times I think so and other times I feel more further away than the miles suggest.
I need a time travel device, If only I could undo some of my great errors, but I cant, I can only try to be a better person now and hope that any small thing I try to do, any way I try to show I care and love might help to bridge the gap.
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